She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Randomize
