Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
