So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
