Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
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