Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
