He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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