Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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