How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
What did we do last night that was yellow?
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
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