I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize