She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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