I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize