This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
