YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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