It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
