I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Randomize
