# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
