Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Randomize
