yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
