I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
