I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
