this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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