Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
