i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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