Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Randomize
