Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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