Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
