Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
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