Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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