how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
