Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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