I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
Green mimosas i think yes
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
