so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Randomize
