there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize
