My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Randomize
