New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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