I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
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