Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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