I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
you have to choose: penises or morals?
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Randomize
