why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I have demons in me.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
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