just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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