Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
YAS. BRING CRAB.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize