Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Randomize
