We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Randomize
