Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
