OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
