Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
