I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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