i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
