I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
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