If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
