Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
